Divorce with Children

Divorce With Children

Divorce can be difficult for both parties involved and for those around them, in particular for the children. On the other hand, having parents who are in an unhappy marriage with irreconcilable differences can result in psychological trauma that can have long lasting effects on the emotional and intellectual growth of a child.

In some cases, divorce may even be a necessary step to ensure his/her safety and well-being. The solution to this dilemma is an amicable divorce. This is of crucial importance to protecting the child from some or even most of the negative effects that a highly contentious and acrimonious divorce can have. Contentious divorce may cause feelings of guilt and abandonment, which could lead to psychological instability and inability to trust in childhood, adolescence, and even in adulthood. This could lead to delayed intellectual development, inability to focus, difficulty in making friends, keeping up with school work, and trouble with authority figures.

In more serious cases, it could lead to clinical depression and/or other psychological disorders that remains chronically recurring throughout life. In addition to the emotional trauma, a contentious divorce that consumes your time and energy could cause you to miss important milestones in your child’s development, such as the first step, first soccer game, dance recitals, award ceremonies, and many others.

An amicable divorce can allow your child to grow healthy with two parents who are separated, but have open communication between each other, especially on matters regarding the child. As hard as it may be to imagine, this is very possible and is likely the best outcome for all the parties involved if divorce is an inevitable outcome. Indeed, as much of the psychological trauma of a divorce results from the child feeling that it may be his/her fault, an amicable divorce allows you and your spouse to have an open conversation with your child about why this may be the best option for the long-term happiness of everyone involved. It also saves the child from the pain of having to observe disputes at home, which could lead to fear and even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

It is important that home remains a “safe place” for your child for his/her sense of stability and security, and an amicable divorce will allow you to do so through mediation, a clear plan of action, and negotiation. The way in which your child will change from your divorce is entirely dependent on how you handle your situation. There is no golden rule to this and every family is different.

My job is to ensure that this process is best suited to your needs and that of your children. As a lawyer exclusively practicing in family law with mediation training with a psychologist, I am well aware of the various effects a divorce can have on your child, and how to best mitigate the negative effects to minimize short and long-term harm. With my expertise and regular consultations with a child & family psychologist, I am certain that my services will exceed your expectations.